Letters - The Chadron Campaign
Letters
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Letters - The Chadron Campaign |
Letters |
Thanks for letting me know my letter is uploaded. Go head and stick my poem on. I guess just put the author as "anonymous gay teen" or something cheesey along those lines. Yeah I went to your page too. I liked it a lot :) BTW: Does Matt have an email address? I'd sure like to drop him a line and let him know how strong I think he is.
Letters to Matt will be forwarded by maggie@critpath.org. Please tell me if they can be posted on the website and whether or not I can use your name.. mh
Date: Thu, 12 Dec 1996 20:34:21 -0700 (MST)
From:
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG
Subject: Chadron..Hell - Same Dif?
I'm writing after viewing your homepage on the Chadron State College thing. I am a Chadron High student. I am gay. I relate totally to what was said about this crummy town. Being even slightly different in Chadron is like holding up a large sign shouting out you want to be harrassed. Daily I walk down hallways and receive taunts and threats and the typical "fag" comments. Last year I tried to kill myself 3 times. What goes on in this town is sick and deranged. CSC was very supporting of both Matt and ALLIES...The only thing critical of CSC Admin I have to say is when I reached out to ALLIES for help regarding myself the door was shut in my face. The Admin of the college refused to have any communication between non-CSC people and the ALLIES club. What has happened is terrible and makes me sick with disgust. What we need to do is educate people and get the word out on the problems of homphobia.
Anonymous CHS Teen
Chadron, Nebraska
Dear Maggie,
I really appreciate and admire your courage to stand up against the opression of gays/lesbians. I am also taking the same stand. I have two sisters who are lesbians, and on top of that, we are Native Americans so we get a double dose of prejudices. However, the Matt McNeil case is not what you have made it out to be. I admired Matt and was one of his peers. We went through a diversity training together here on campus and that is how I met him. I was aware of his struggle being openly gay. I along with countless others reached out to Matt who repeatedly refused our help! Most of the threats came from the community, not the college! It is unfair to attack Chadron State when you don't even know the whole story. I was saddened to see all the untrue statements people were writing when they don't know the real story, especially outsiders. If you want the truth Maggie, call Matt and ask him why he refused the help people offered him. You have my permission to refer to me when he tells you about Rex Nowlan and how I offered to gather the Native American Students and others to have a peaceful demonstration in front of Mr. Nowlan's office. He refused that too! Please find out the truth before you start hurting more people. I would like this printed on your web site!
Sincerely, Lori White Face Chadron State College
12/9/96 Lori thank you for your message, for bringing Rex Nowlan's name into the discussion, and for your desire to have a demonstration in front of Mr. Nowlan's office. I assume that if Matt expands on his intial statement, Mr. Nowlan's "blame the victim" attitude will come up. Matt tells me that there was a group discussion of the possibility of demonstration and it was decided by the group that it would not be a good tactic at that time. I did ask Matt about your generalization that he repeatedly refused help. He asked for specifics. What help did he refuse?
You are right that the story is more complicated than the original
article in The Eagle suggested. Chadron College, like Rhea
Murray and Gabi
Clayton, tried to help its troubled gay teenager. Depression, alcohol
abuse, and thoughts of suicide are endemic among gay youth. Gabi and Rhea
have websites which tell of their struggle against homophobia. I hope that
as we move forward against the oppression of gays and lesbians that the
the administration, faculty, and students of Chadron will come to value
this website which documents the "Chadron Campaign Against Homophobia."
Maggie
Date: Tue, 10 Dec 1996 14:38:40 -0700
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG
Subject: Take our College off of your WRONG site
Don't you find what you're doing to be wrong? Don't you realize that they are wrong. It is not normal, and stepping past what is normal, I'll say that it- they are an embarrassment to society, and a stain to our college and community. No, this is not from a homophobic stance, although I'm quite sure you will see this letter as just that. This is a moral stance, an ethical stance an opposition to this sick CHOICE of lifestyle. These people need to be shown that their logic is faulty, and that they are living in unquestionable sin. Homosexuality must be stopped, no matter what the costs are. So no, I don't hate the people, but I hate their SIN, and I will do everything in my power to stop this sickness that has been dubbed an alternative lifestyle. I ask you to remove my College from your Website.
Your website, and these people are an embarrassment to all.
Feel free to respond
I asked if I could use his name, he said yes and I wrote again.
From: Maggie Heineman
To: Tom Samuels
Cc: Steve Calverley
Date: 12/13/96
Subject: Bridges Across the Divide
At 08:49 AM 12/11/96 -0700,
Tom Samuels wrote:
<<Feel free to include my name on the website. Tom Samuels Chadron State College Freshman. I am not afraid of openly speaking my beliefs, so I have no problem with the rest of the world knowing my thoughts.Thanks>>
Tom,
The person that I'm copying on this is Steve Calverley. He lives in St. Catherines in Ontario, Canada. If you revisit the Chadron website you will see a story there about Brock University at http://www.critpath.org/action-project/cschist.htm#brock
I received that item from Steve who is a counselor with New Direction, a reorientation ministry. We met each other last May through the Internet, because he visited a page in which Mitzi Henderson, then president of Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, wrote about meeting with those that we disagree with.
Mitzi: <<But above all a bridge works only when the traffic flows across. That traffic must flow both ways. That means that we will meet those that disagree with us as well as our friends.>>
Please read Mitzi's speech. http://www.critpath.org/pflag-talk/bridges/
Steve 'accepted Mitzi's invitation' and over the months that we have corresponded we have come to trust each other even though we disagree on fundamental things. We have been talking for many months about building a website together, "bridges across the divide."
I talked to Steve on the phone this evening. We would like to correspond with you and other students at Chadron-- gay and straight, highschool and college (I'm getting email). Steve and I know how to do this, because we did it with each other. We started not by identifying differences, but by searching for common ground. Some of the correspondence would be the beginning of the bridges website (separate from the Chadron site-- because it will not just be about Chadron). Nothing would be uploaded without permission. The site doesn't exist yet, our correspondence would be a beginning.
You are not afraid of openly speaking your beliefs and you have no problem with the rest of the world knowing your thoughts. You see, we have something in common already. :-)
I'll tell you a couple of things about myself and ask a couple of questions in case you decide you want to correspond with Steve and me.
My parents were Baptist Missionaries and I was born in Burma (now Myanmar) in 1936 -- I am 60 years old. I have three children and two grandchildren My oldest daughter is a lesbian and she has a life-partner. They are both college professors and they have been together since 1987. I live in Philadelphia and you can see two pictures of me on my home page. http://www.critpath.org/~maggie/
You're a Freshman. What's your hometown? Have you decided what you'll major in? Do you belong to the Christian Intervarsity Group on campus? That's enough questions for the first email.
Maggie
I have not yet received another message from Tom. 12/17/96. mh
December 9, Another letter of support for Chadron and the Allies
Dear Maggie,
I am writing to you so that you will have yet one more letter of support for Chadron State and the Allies.
I was an English instructor at Chadron State College for the '94-'95 school year and helped form the Allies. The group was created because there was a need for the gay and lesbian students on campus to support each other and feel supported.
In early 1995 the club gained official Chadron State College club status and held a public forum to openly discuss the issues involved with the club as well as student, club and community concerns. Over 125 people attended. Some came to oppose the group and others came in support. For this small town it was an impressive showing.
Chadron State College is supportive of all of its students through faculty and administration. When I left Chadron, I knew that the group would continue and was in excellent hands.
The incident with Matt was unfortunate, but it is not any more spectacular than being harrassed at a gay pride parade or just walking down the street with one's same-sex partner in any major town. Chadron may be rural but the people there are generally genuine and open-minded. There are also bigots and homophobes in Chadron, but there are bigots and homophobes everywhere.
Sincerely,
Liesl Seborg
Return-Path: <sbecker@CSCU.csc.edu>
Date: Tue, 17 Dec 1996 23:51:49 -0700 (MST)
From: Stephen Becker <sbecker@CSCU.csc.edu>
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG
Subject: Allies web page
The allies web page is now up address is http://shadow.csc.edu/allies the responses from members will be on a second page http://shadow.csc.edu/allies/issues.html but before I put any of them on, they are being proofread by our club sponser. Feel free to link to the pages, the chadron campaign page is linked via both of these pages.
Sincerely, STephen
An anonymous student wrote
At 03:23 PM 12/5/96 -0700, CSC Student wrote:
Hi,
I'm a student at Chadron State College. I knew Matt McNeil. The reason I'm writing is that this whole thing has been blown way out of proportion. I'm not saying that Matt wasn't harrassed, but that wasn't the only reason he left college. Matt had many reasons. I believe the college and students are being bashed by people that don't know the whole story. The writer of that article in the Eagle didn't know the whole story in my opinion. Many students drop out of college each year. Matt happened to be gay, and now its a big issue. I'm not sexually biased, I even thought he looked cute in a dress. I just wanted to let you know that, Matt wasn't pushed out of college by anyone or by any ONE THING. As everyone as told the story. I think that people that write such articles should ask people that know, instead of writing what makes a good story. It's not like Matt is our only gay student on campus. We have more than a hand full of them, and they haven't quit school. CSC even has a support group for gays. I hope this note has been informational to you.
Sincerely, A Concerned CSC Student
About Matt's being in drag at the dance. It was the dance on the weekend immediately before halloween, so there were many costume parties going on, and some people came to the dance dressed that way. Some people also came dressed in formal attire. (info from a friend of Matt's at Chadron.)
Maggie Heineman sent me a copy of the letter she sent you yesterday (Thursday, December 5, 1996 ). In it she told you about me:
<<Gabi Clayton, whose son committed suicide after a gay bashing will receive this. Gabi has developed a lot of expertise in this area, she's the webmaster for the "Safe Schools Coalition in Anti-Violence Documention Project." >>
I do have some things to add to what she wrote to you. First, I would like to invite you to read "Bill's Story" - which I have up on my website. There you can read about what happened to my son, Bill, who committed suicide at 17 after he was assaulted in a hate crime. It is quite long, because it is not a simple story.
I also hope you will take the time to read the "Safe Schools Anti-Violence Documentation Project, Third Annual Report - Fall 1996". In this report you can read the stories of kids who were harassed because of their sexual orientation, and you can learn more about the effects that harassment has - both directly and indirectly. The report has new statistics that are quite frightening, but unfortunately not surprising. The report shows what happens to young people who live in a world they find filled with homophobia, hate and ignorance. And you can learn what is being done and suggested to help make schools safe. While the report focuses on kids in high school and younger, what they face and their responses are many of the same issues and reactions that continue into adulthood.
You can find links to both of these on my homepage: http://members.tripod.com/~claytoly/index.html
That said, I would like to say that when you read Bill's story you will see that someone could say to me, as you did about Matt McNeil: "You are blowing this whole thing out of proportion. I'm not saying that Bill wasn't assaulted in a hate crime, but that wasn't the only reason he committed suicide. Bill had many reasons... Many people commit suicide each year. Bill happened to be assaulted in a hate crime, and now its a big issue."
If someone said that to me, they would be right. Bill had many reasons. As I said, his story is complicated. But what I can tell you is that I KNOW that my wonderful son would not have chosen suicide if he hadn't been bashed in that hate crime. I know because I loved him and lived with him and comforted him and did my best to protect him from harm all his life. I know because I am - I was - his mother.
In her letter to you, Maggie said: <<Most gay people, whether closeted or out, live with a fear that you have never experienced.>>
And in your letter, you suggest that people should ask people that know, instead of writing what makes a good story. Well, I don't know Matt, but I did know Bill. And what I wrote in "Bill's Story" is not a good story. It is a horrible story.
My son committed suicide because he could not face living in a world that he saw as so full of hate. At seventeen, he lived with fear on a daily basis. Fear based on experience. Because of that assault he lost hope and chose death. I don't know Matt, but I have become painfully aware of the world he lives in. It is very much the world you and I live in as well.
Gabi Clayton
Date: Mon, 16 Dec 1996 10:53:58 -0700 (MST)
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG
Maggie, This is my letter that was published in last week's Eagle.
TO: MAGGIE
I would like to open this letter by saying that I deeply regret Matt leaving Chadron State College. I am sorry if I, in any way, made him feel unwelcome. That is not at all what this letter is about. My concern is that good open minded people like myself are being unfairly portrayed as white sheet clad yokels complete with pointed hats and jack boots.
The persecution of any person is fundamentally wrong, Illegal, and unconstitutional. Libelous slander is too Ms. Heineman. Blacklisting our school is wrong. Let's not forget that the terroristic threats made toward Matt were made by a High School Student This is as reported in The Eagle of November 21st.
I am not saying that Homophobia isn't a problem on our campus. But why should those of us who are understanding to the needs of all people be so unfairly labeled?
I demand an apology.
I understand that there ARE people who don't accept homosexuality. Their ARE people who violently lash out at people that are different then what they consider status quo. I AM not one of these people, and there are a lot of other people on the Campus of Chadron State College that feel the same way. Alienating people never solves problems. Homophobia is a problem at Chadron State.
It is a problem that will be solved only through dialogue and respect. I won't be solved by zealots and band wagon jumpers. The people of this area have a tradition. We handle our own problems. This problem won't be solved by distant third parties. It won't be solved by people slandering large groups of people. In short Ms. Heineman thank you for showing us the error of our ways. Now either come here and, fight this battle with us or go away. You can't solve this problem, It will be solved by Me, and other understanding people like alot of the people you have alienated.
Rocky,
Thank you for sending me your letter that was published in last week's Eagle. I understand that there was an article about me the previous week, but I don't know what it said. Would you send it to me?
You are quite right that good minded open people should not be unfairly portrayed. I have tried at all times to present fairly whatever information I have. First the Eagle article of November 21, then Kathy Agar's message and the message from Lori White Face, and other messages that have come to me have gone onto the website. I assume I have your premission to put your letter onto the website?
You have asked for an apology. The original messages that went out over the Internet (which I did not send, I came into it later) did say that the college did not protect Matt. My first alert also made that statement, and I do apologize for that generalization. Yesterday (before receiving your demand for an apology) I sent the following message to Senator Kerrey, Dr Krause, and several Internet lists, with a request that it be posted to campus lists.
Actually, I *would* like to come to Chadron some time. The Chadron website will continue. I may soon be posting a letter that Matt wrote a couple of months ago which the Eagle refused to publish. It concerns the event that Lori White Face wanted to demonstrate about.
Moreover, in January another website "Bridges Across the Divide" will be launched. I will be doing it jointly with a man whom I respect greatly and who has very different views on homosexuality than I do. For a preview of that website visit http://www.fopc.org/politics/resissue.html
This is the message I sent to Dr. Krause yesterday. Please consider it my apology.
Permission to repost.
On November 21, the Chadron Eagle, the student newspaper at Chadron State College in Nebraska, had a story about Matt McNeil, a student who was gaybashed and who dropped out of college. After seeing posts on the Internet, I picked up the story, established a website, and have been following the story ever since--both at a personal level (many phone calls with Matt) and as an activist.
It is a complicated story. As the story evolves so does the website. There are links now to first-person accounts of gaybashing, dropping out and suicide and to resources concerning these issues. The Chadron story is in the process of shifting from the college to the town.
Snips from the remodeled website:
http://www.critpath.org/action-project/chadron.html
Matt McNeil was a victim of hate and he dropped out of college. Chadron helped Matt, but he still needed to leave. (links to Matt's testimony and other statements)
Several people, including Matt McNeil, have written me, (Maggie Heineman) to say that the College administration tried to support Matt as an individual. Kathy Agar, the faculty advisor for Allies, the glb student group; Lori White Face, who wanted to demonstrate on his behalf; several anonymous college students, and, most interesting, a gay high school student, have written about that support. The highschool student has given permission to use both his poem his letter.
-- also on Chadron Campaign homepage:
Gabi's son was a victim of hate and he killed himself. Gabi helped Bill, but he still needed to leave.
[snip] (links to info about Bill Clayton & Safe Schools Coalition) --- Rhea's son was a victim of hate. He dropped out of highschool. Rhea helped Bruce, but he still needed to leave.
[snip] (links to info about Bruce and Rhea Murray) ----- Not long ago, the student newspaper at DePauw ridiculed gays. Eric Edberg echoed Rhea Murray's cry of "No More!" and The Bachelorette became known on the Internet. Some good things began to happen.
[snip] (links to info about DePauw Campaign) --- Not long ago, the student newspaper at Chadron told Matt's story. Rhea's cry of "No More!" echoed again and Matt McNeil became known on the Internet. What are some good things that could happen?
[snip] (links to statments from Matt McNeil, the chair of the Univ.Nebraska-Lincoln
G/L Alumni/ae Association, other letters, teen suicide info and resources
for fighting homophobia in schools.)
================== posted 12/15/96 by
Maggie Heineman <maggie@critpath.org> webmaster,
Chadron Campaign http://www.critpath.org/action-project/chadron.html
Eric Edberg is the faculty advisor to United DePauw in a personal letter, he wrote
Date: Sun, 08 Dec 1996 02:31:53 -0500
From: Eric Edberg <edberg@mail.tds.net>
To: maggie@critpath.org
Subject: Re: Matt
Your message regarding your conversation with Matt prompts several thoughts. I'm just back from a couple days "off," with much needed rest.
No matter how nice and helpful the administration and faculty may have been to Matt, what I gather is that the social environment was not only unwelcoming but hostile. From my perspective, then, while there were obviously contributing factors, such as the breakup from an unhappy relationship, the general environment was not one in which Matt could deal with things, especially without peer support.
The thing we're starting to address at DePauw is this: how do we change the general culture? How do we affect our current students? And how about future students? Do we work to specifically recruit students who are diversity-friendly? The problem of intolerance and fear which manifested itself in The Bachelorette has made itself clear in issues of racism and misogyny as well.
A self-proclaimed gay student from Wabash College e-mailed me Thursday to say I need "to get a sense of humor" because after all, The Bachelorette was just good-natured fun meant to attack the masculinity of Wabash students.
I replied that my correspondent might consider changing his name to "Uncle Tom," for such "good-natured fun" contributes to a climate in which his contemporaries get bashed, killed, hounded from school, commit suicide, and get cut off from family and friends. Besides which, my correspondent, like myself and every other gay man and lesbian in this country, is legally speaking a second-class citizen, denied a number of fundamentally important rights and privileges. When he has full and equal rights, I said, then I'll be able to laugh along with The Bachelorette.
The response from Chadron sounds as if sure, some faculty and administrators were supportive, as they damned well ought to be, but it is the larger climate of the institution that needs to be addressed.
For some reason, the outcry over The Bachelorette has gotten what I think is a critical mass of not only administrators and faculty but STUDENTS to sit up and take notice here. But I think it will probably take another case, probably with a messy homophobia-related sexual harrassment case against a faculty member, probably with a big lawsuit, for people to REALLY get it.
So I'm looking at how I can empower the students to stand up for themselves, so I'm not the Lone Ranger and the DPU homophobia policeman.
The thing is that this Bachelorette thing was my personal "Stonewall." Until the day I found about it, homophobia, heterosexism, and intolerance at DePauw were things I disliked and resentfully put up with. And when I saw that stupid little paper something happened inside me and I decided that I simply will not accept it any more. I stopped swallowing my anger. As Rhea says, "NO MORE!"
(BTW, no question that the Chrysler campaign laid the groundwork both in terms of what to do and, more importantly, the internal place to come from.)
A lot of people in leadership positions here are getting it. The LGB students here, not so much. They're mostly in a "just don't harrass me and I'll be happy" mode. That's part of their growth. I've been there, too. Last year I wrote an article for The DePauw about great it was that I could come out and not get fired and there are movies with gay characers (a big step forward from when I was a teen). Now I'm angry that I feared with some obvious justification that if I came out before I got tenure I may have had people trying (covertly) to get rid of me.
Sounds like the Chadron people are still in the "this is too bad and we're doing what we can" place--the band-aid rather than transformative place.
Maggie, we are pushing, demanding, forcing society to redefine by expansion what is normal, healthy, moral, and socially acceptable. And the power comes from love--from the love of parents like you and the rest of PFLAG, declaring what you know to be true. And it comes from the love that is the healthy self-love of people who know there is nothing wrong with them.
Chadron sounds as if it is where I was until just a few weeks ago--operating in the space that's left when you think you can only help, not fundamentally change. Something will happen sooner or later to shake them up, or they'll be healed as part of the general social transformation which is underway.
Did you ever read "The Hundreth Monkey"? It's a book, popular back in the anti-nuke days of the early 80s, about social transformation, and the amazing things that happen when a "critical mass" of people (or monkeys) come to realize something new and healthy and helpful to the species. It has to do with the collective unconscious. It tells the story of a set of islands somewhere. One one island, one monkey learns how to wash a banana or some other fruit. Soon he has taught all the other monkeys on his island to do it. The suddenly, with no direct communication with anyone on the other islands, ALL the monkeys on ALL the islands suddenly start washing their bananas. Supposedly it is a true and well-documented story.
We don't have to convince all those religious right people. We just have to keep winning hearts with love and declaration of the truth. And one day, the transformation will be apparent.
Pardon me for going on and on. I needed to vent a bit I guess.
I guess I'll just go to bed!
Thanks again for what you do. You're one of my favorite monkeys!
--Eric
Three days later, Eric wrote again. I'd been coming to the same conclusions, but Eric took the time to write them down. This was Wednesday, December 11. On Tuesday, December 17, I received word that the Allies website was up and there were links to the Chadron Campaign. Yippee!!! :-)
Date: Wed, 11 Dec 1996 09:15:23 -0500
From: Eric Edberg <edberg@mail.tds.net>
To: maggie@critpath.org
Subject: Time to Reflect?
Maggie,
I got your message including Kathy Agar's note.
You know I love you and appreciate and admire you! Yet Kathy's note made me realize that things are not working with the Chadron Campaign as we might like to see, and we need to get beyond a who's right and who's wrong way of looking at it.
Perhaps it's time to step back and reflect a bit on some of the interpersonal dynamics of the situation, and also to look at when and how external pressure is most effectively used in a situation. Our commitment is to our long-term goal, making this a society which works for everyone regardless of sexual orientation, and we always need to keep as clear as possible about what works and what doesn't.
I wonder if sometimes in our zeal to make a difference by confronting homophobia--which must be done--we don't sometimes get so accusatory that we lose sight of the "Bridges of Respect" spirit you and I both find so moving and inspiring. Here at DePauw we've felt supported, yet at Chadron obviously many with whom we should be allies feel attacked.
So I'll quickly compare and contrast what I observe about the DePauw and Chadron situations.
Here at DePauw (and at Chrysler as well) there was a person in a leadership role within the institution who had already taken a firm and public stand, and who had asked for outside support. I strongly denounced The Bachelorette within the DePauw community, and I had specific purposes in my "action alert" I sent out. I knew that many, actually most, students didn't understand why it was so offensive and hurtful, and I believed that a lot of letters through the net would help educate in that regard. I knew that it would clearly educate people to the fact that regardless of whether or not they understood those issues, that gay and lesbian people and our allies will stick up for ourselves and each other when attacked.
What I didn't anticipate was that the university president would feel so much heat that he felt he had to respond. And of course we are lucky here that both the president and the chairman of the board of trustees are very diversity oriented in general, and friendly and supportive on LGB issues in particular.
The website you created was most welcome, and of course everything it contains directly related to DePauw came from someone here. The main point is that it is part of an effort generated within DePauw and widely supported at DePauw.
Now at Chadron there's an entirely different situation. As far as I can tell, there's no one there (yet) taking an Eric Edberg or Ron Woods role. And you know, I couldn't be as effective as I've been here were it not for the fact that I've spent over eight years building relationships and trust among my colleagues, taking a lot of leadership on academic issues. People know, respect, and admire me. AND I have the job security of tenure, and know I have support on these issues from the Dean of Music and the university president.
Back to Chadron. Clearly there are people working to make a difference there. Yet there's no one ... asking for external pressure to help with the internal campaign.
That's a big difference.
With the Chrysler campaign, you helped Ron Woods and became his partner.
With the DePauw campaign, you helped me and became United DePauw's partner.
With Chadron, though, there's no responsible adult whom you're assisting. The very people we need to empower feel attacked and even undermined.
With Chrysler and DePauw, the time was right, the iron was hot, and it was time for an internet strike. As we all learn about how to use this technology in the cause of making things better for everyone, we need to make sure we are helping the people we need to help.
Another thing to understand about colleges is they have their own culture. The person who agreed to be the "internal ally" at Chadron is, as I remember, the editor at the student paper. Generally speaking, . . .no student has a long-term commitment to or investment in an institution. They are there for a few years, take what they need, and move on. That's their role. Generally speaking, only tenured faculty have made a long-term commitment to a college, and vice-versa. Even administrators tend to be in and out fairly quickly.
It a nutshell then, what's not working about Chadron is that there is not a strong internal person whom we are assisting. This is an entirely different game.
Is it a mistake to be taking a stand and taking action? No. Are there some lessons we can learn from this? I think so. Perhaps it is appropriate to be the outsiders raising hell about a situation at a place none of us are directly connected with. But in that case we must realize that we take a very different role than the Chrysler and DePauw campaigns, and that we will be resented and in many cases discounted as "outsiders" by those within the situation.
Love, Eric
Comment: There are people working within the College willing to say NO MORE!, people like Kathy Agar, the faculty advisor of the glb student group, Becky Caseli, the director of the multicultural program. When the message came December 17 that the Allies group was linking to the Chadron site, it felt good. The tension between the outside pressure and the "people on the ground" seemed to be lessening. Earlier that day I'd received a message from a friend in Fairbanks who had demonstrated in the Chrysler Campaign.
A Message from Richard
Seward in Alaska where we decided not to establish a website
for the Diamond High School situation.
December 17, 1996
Good Morning Maggie et al
I have followed the Dimond High School club debate in Anchorage. Yes, I know that the homophobes are attempting to use e-mail from non-Alaskans (lower 48 or "outsiders" = non-Alaskans) as support of the "homosexual agenda" argument. But in "Alaskan" parlance, I believe the following to be true:
Alaskan: "I do not appreciate e-mail from the lower 48" means "The moral pressure exerted thru the Internet scares me. I am wrong in my thinking, but I am too stubborn to say so, so I will blame the effective e-mail pressure."
The Anchorage situation was NOT conducive to an Net-Activist campaign such as DePauw and Chrysler because:
1. We did not have a "body" on the ground. Like Ron or Eric.
2. The School Board was doing the RIGHT thing ... I think the Net
actions are better at flaming than at supporting.
3. There was not a single action we wanted done or a dialogue that
needed to take place.
Now the Chaudron action is a different kettle of fish. Less fun, more confusing, but more interesting than DePauw and Chrysler. There you and others seem to NOT be after a single action or series of action, but rather after a change of heart for a whole town and university system. Interesting and of more import than Chrysler. IF you can use e-mail and the Web to set the topic of discussion in town as "I am not homophobic, and to prove it I will ...." then you win. I believe that every time a person thinks "Am I treating homosexuals fairly" instead of "Homosexuals deserve nothing" or worse yet, don't think about gay rights .... then you win regardless of the person's personal thoughts. So if Chaudron College and town are THINKING about gay rights and are spending energy defending the positive actions they took on Matt's behalf .... then the next time such a man or woman comes out, the people will do more.
Just my $0.02 worth.
Richard
PS Must be the heat wave that made me so verbose ... it is above zero for the first time in weeks!
Date: Sun, 08 Dec 1996 12:25:30
-0700
From: Student <anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU>
Reply-To: anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG Subject: (no subject)
In my opinion, Chadron State College did the best they could to help Matt. They provided a safe living environment as best as possible.
Maggie Heineman: The college tried. There must be educational programs to eliminate homophobia and serious punishment for those who gaybash. See UNLBGALA suggestions.
Date: Sun, 08 Dec 1996 12:29:54 -0700
From: Student <anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU>
Reply-To: anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG
Subject: (no subject)
The death threat that Matt received did not happen on campus. How can the college control what happens outside it's control. It can't.
Maggie Heineman: Questions remain about the prosecution of the case against the high school student who made the death threat.
Maybe the correct title of your web page should be, The Community of Chadron, and not the college.
Maggie Heineman: Good idea. The title is no longer "Chadron College Campaign against Homophobia," it is "Chadron Campaign against Homophobia." The town as well as the college needs to be involved in the campaign.
Date: Sun, 08 Dec 1996 12:33:33 -0700
From: Student <anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU
Reply-To: anonymous@cscu.CSC.EDU
To: maggie@CRITPATH.ORG Subject: (no subject)
A student that feels uncomfortable in their surrounding does not go to Homecoming in "Drag". If Matt was so uncomfortable, and so hate bashed, I don't believe that he would have gone to the dance!
All of these things that happened to Matt, the death threat, and the sign on his door, happened before the dance.
Besides, if the college is as Homophobic as everyone is playing it up to be, why did the students allow him to attend the dance safely. Matt danced the night away.
Matt writes, "First off I did not "dance the night away." I danced 2 dances and left. We were there for maybe a total of 15 minutes. Also, I was rather intoxicated." Matt says that he had both friends and support from faculty while he was at Chadron. Gabi Clayton supported her son but he killed himself. Support for today's students is not enough. To elminate the behavior that some students pursued, relentlessly and without intervention, there must be educational programs to eliminate homophobia and serious punishment for those who gaybash.
December 5, Maggie Heineman responds to CSC Student
Dear CSC student <student@cscu.csu.edu>,
Hi, You have an interesting email address Does everyone use it?
Thank you for acknowledging that Matt was harrassed. I would expect that Matt's leaving college was a combination of things and I don't know whether he woud have left without the harrassment. I do know that noone can learn while subjected to the treatment that the Chadron Eagle describes in its story about Matt.
I've received some email about your comments:
ps, for that person who made a statement about someone going to homecoming in a dress is provoking harrassment, you might state that the dance was also a halloween dance, and his drag was his costume for the costume party we were all at. He is not the first man to dress as a woman at a halloween dance here.
I appreciate your writing because it gives me an opportunity to explain what the Chadron Campaign Against Homophobia is about. It's not about Matt's leaving school or bashing the college or its students. It's about helping Chadron understand the college's responsibility to provide a safe place for learning. It's about asking the college to become the prime mover in the it's own campaign against homophobia.
Notice that I have copied Dr. Krause, the acting president of Chadron, Senator Kerrey, who is good on the issue and certainly cares about the colleges in Nebraska, and the Chadron Eagle which broke the story about Matt.
I'm also blind-copying many people and asking them to send a note, to reply-to-all in order to help me explain to you, Dr. Krause, Senator Kerrey, and the Chadron Eagle why the college needs to act-- and what forms that action can take.
Two people at DePauw University are receiving this message: President Bob Bottoms and Eric Edberg, the faculty advisor of the gay student group there. DePauw has responded beautifully to a homophobic incident on that campus. President Bottoms understands and perhaps DePauw can help Chadron rise to the occasion.
The press associate at National PFLAG is receiving this. Today we talked about her press release countering the Focus on the Family attack on gay students. She can make it specific by telling about DePauw and Chadron. The DePauw story will be positive and have a PFLAG component since PFLAG people have helped with the DePauw campaign, not only on the net, but on campus as well. I agree with you it's necessary to know the whole story. Neither she nor I will issue any press release before the Chadron story becomes clearer. The stories we want to tell are the stories about schools and colleges doing good things.
Gabi Clayton, whose son committed suicide after a gay bashing will receive this. Gabi has developed a lot of expertise in this area, she's the webmaster for the "Safe Schools Coalition in Anti-Violence Documention Project."
Rhea Murray might write and tell you about her 14 year old son being driven from highschool by gay bashing. Ron and Dave and Martha can tell you horror stories from the Chrysler corporation. You see it's not just Chadron, or just colleges, or highschools. Most gay people, whether closeted or out, live with a fear that you have never experienced.
Dear Student, I hope that you get many letters and I hope that you will read them all because right now you don't have a clue about the lives of gay and lesbian people. It's not your fault. You just don't know. I hope that you care enough to learn.
You said: "Many students drop out of college each year. Matt happened to be gay, and now its a big issue."
It's not a big issue because a gay student drops out of school. It's a big issue because serious gay-bashing was going on and the college didn't even know it was happening. A member of Lincoln PFLAG said, "I spoke with someone in admissions. She claims that the school was unaware of any problem with harassment before Matt's departure."
Becoming aware is the way to begin.
Please visit the the Chadron and DePauw websites, you'll see what DePauw is doing and there's background information about gay bashing at the Chadron site.
Sincerely,
Maggie Heineman
--------- Letters to Chadron College-----------
University of Nebraska-Lincoln
Gay and Lesbian Alumni/ae Assoc., Inc.
P.O. Box 45357,
Kansas City, MO 64171
UNLGALA@JUNO.COM
December 6, 1996
To Chadron State College, Decision Makers and Affiliated Bodies,
Homophobia is a very important issue at Universities and Colleges all over the United States and World. I personally grew up being harassed for being gay, even though I didn't know I was gay, in high school. When this element transfers over to an academic environment, it encourages the vestiges of hatred to blossom. Chadron State College ought to do something immediately about the situation that drove Matt McNeil from its doors. It is the responsibility of all Universities and Colleges to protect all students. I would like to repeat that, all students. That means all students including gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered members.
I was a gay activist from 1983-1987 and beyond at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln. I know the trials and tribulations that hatred can bring down upon gay/les/bi/trans students that are not adequately protected.
Some things that can be done include: 1) establishment of a support group or center for gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgendered students, 2) Homophobia, racism, sexism education of the students, faculty and staff, 3) strict law enforcement regarding hate crimes against minorities, 4) an effective policy for the campus on handling homophobia, 5) protection for gays/lesbians/bisexuals/transgendered just as there would be for someone who has been battered, abused, etc.
Harassment of those who are considered "different" is not new to the world or to our society, but it ought to be tempered and fought with tolerance and understanding. Chadron State College needs to protect the students who are gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender just as many others Universities and Colleges already do. The University of Nebraska has a non-discrimination policy forbidding discrimination. It also has a resource center at UNL, campus groups for support, connections between the Administration, Faculty and Students, support groups and policies to handle the safety and welfare of all students. I say to you Chadron State College, "Get on the Stick!!!!" Who do you think you are? Get up to date with other colleges and get the needs of all students met not just the homophobes who would do harm to those who are inherently only living life with love, learning and hope.
I would encourage Matt McNeil to take every recourse possible. I would hope that he will contact our organization and the Nebraska Civil Liberties Union as soon as possible.
Hatred is not something acquired overnight, it is accumulated through the years. We must put up dams, educate, legislate and activate against the spread of hatred against all people who are oppressed.
I hope that every legislator looks into this matter. I hope that every administrator who reads this looks at homophobia on campuses. I hope that Chadron State College decides to put homophobia in the closet.
Sincerely, Rodney A. Bell, II
Chairperson Univ. of Nebr.-Lincoln Gay and Lesbian Alumni/ae
Assoc., Inc.
P.O. Box 45357
Kansas City, MO 64171
UNLGALA@juno.com (816) 931-6829
FACES comments on anti-gay actions at Chadron State College
Wed, 04 Dec 1996 16:50:19 -0700
To:eaglenew@CSCU.csc.edu, ckrause@csc1.csc.edu,
From: Barry Wick <facessd@rapidnet.com>
Subject: FACES comments on anti-gay actions at Chadron
State College
Cc: editor@argusleader.com, journal@rapidnet.com
Free Americans Creating Equal Status of South Dakota, Inc. today condemns the actions of a few students at Chadron State College in Chadron, Nebraska who forced our friend, Matt McNeil, to leave the path of his higher education in favor of his personal safety. Such choices should not exist in modern society for persons perceived to be gay or lesbian.
FACES demands Chadron State College officials and City of Chadron police look into these threats without any further delay to indentify and question those who have perpetrated these incidents, to develop charges against those who have perpetrated these incidents and to take the appropriate action to assure this kind of harassment and intimidation does not occur again.
Chadron State College is responsible for maintaining the safety of their students while on campus and responsible for the continuance of an atmosphere of intolerance.
Matt McNeil, 18, has been forced by anti-gay epithets, threats of violence and violent actions against his property which included "keying" of his automobile among other actions to leave his higher education behind.
Matt McNeil has been featured in articles in the Chadron State College Eagle.
Here is an excerpt from the November 21st article:
"Matt found a passage from the Bible taped to his door one day, and whenever he left, or entered his room, he would always get piercing looks from other students that said, in Matt's eyes, "I want to kill you."
"The death threat happened one night when he want to get gas. As he was getting out of his car he saw a group of guys approaching him. They were guys who had harassed him the night before.
"Instead of getting into a fight, Matt immediately got back into his car and went to a friend's house to see if she could get gas for him. When his friend, Kris King, went back to get gas, the guys were waiting.
"He followed me and cornered me in a parking lot. He then asked me where my faggot friend was. He was very mad and had so much hate in him," King said."
FACES further urges the State of Nebraska to pass legislation to outlaw such intimidation, to include sexual orientation in hate crime statistics, in civil rights protections and to work towards a future when such intimidating actions can never be thought of as approved by a civilized society.
McNeil is a volunteer for FACES of South Dakota, Inc.
Chadron, Nebraska is less than 100 miles from Rapid City, South Dakota. A complete version of the story is available on the internet at http://www.critpath.org/action-project/cschist.htm#news.
FACES is South Dakota's largest organization for bisexuals, gays, lesbians and transgendered persons.
FACES internet address is http://www.rapidnet.com/~facessd/.
Contact: Barry Wick, Executive Director, 605-343-5577
Barry Wick, Executive Director South Dakota Alternative
Library
Free Americans Creating Equal Status of South Dakota,
Inc.
FACES of South Dakota, a publication
13121 South Creekview Road Rapid City,
South Dakota 57702-8503 Phone 605-343-5577,
FAX 605-394-8962 ALL NEW WEBPAGES!!!
http://www.rapidnet.com/~facessd/
email: facessd@rapidnet.com
Date: Sat, 07 Dec 1996
Dr. Krause,
It has come to my attention that freshman student, Matt McNeil, withdrew from classes because of harassment he was subjected to while attending Chadron State College.
After speaking with someone in your admissions department, I understand that Chadron State College has an anti-discrimination policy which does include sexual orientation. As a Nebraska resident and a member of PFLAG, I urge you to utilize this policy to investigate and take appropriate action against those students involved in the harassment of Matt McNeil.
By taking appropriate action now, students, staff and faculty will realize that harassment of any kind will not be tolerated at Chadron State College, and that you are dedicated to making your campus a safe and positive environment for everyone.
I would also like to encourage you to contact one of the Nebraska PFLAG Chapters. They would be more than willing to work with Chadron State College to help insure a safe and positive atmosphere exists on campus for all students, staff and faculty.
Chris Shepherd <cshepherd@navix.net>
__________________________________________________
Contact Information for the Nebraska PFLAG Chapters
PFLAG Lincoln-Cornhusker P.O. Box 30128 Lincoln, NE 68501-0128 402-434-9880 http://www.geocities.com/WestHollywood/4882/
PFLAG Fullerton Post Office Box 833 Fullerton, NE 68638 308-536-2521
PFLAG Hastings c/o Hastings College Health Center P.O. 269 Hastings, NE 68901 402-461-7372
PFLAG Hendley Post Office Box 427 Hendley, NE 68946 308-265-7620
PFLAG Holdredge-Kearney 1320 8th Avenue Holdrege, NE 68949 308-995-5490
PFLAG Omaha 2912 Lynnwood Drive Omaha, NE 68123-1597 402-291-6781
________________________________________
Tue, 03 Dec 1996
I understand why a Matt McNeil may have left your school. I was not openly gay, but attended a small-town school (that specialized in my career field). I didn't receive the level of harrassment that Matt did, but I was "figured out" by some, and didn't have exactly a carefree experience.
The issue here is official sanction. If the troublemakers can hassle someone without punishment, they will continue to do so. Matters will usually escalate until the opportunity to harrass disappears, either through official sanction or lack of target.
Matt will be fine. There are other schools he can attend where he will be able to be whole. The loss is for your school. You lost a fine student that could teach plenty to many, because it wasn't safe for him to do so in your small town. There is a gulf of distance between education and recruitment (which isn't possible for a gay person to do anyway). It's a pity the students who need the education the most won't get it.
Gary Rimar
Graduate of Highest Distinction
Ferris State University, 1986
Clawson, Michigan
____________________________________
Date: Tue, 03 Dec 1996 09:16:00 -0800 (PST)
It has come to my attention that your college lost a student recently when he withdrew from classes because people on the campus made it clear that he was not welcome because he was homosexual. I am neither a student nor a faculty member at Chadron. However, as a student and as an educator, I am deeply concerned by any incidence of prejudice at an American college or university.
The vast majority of American colleges and universities are governed by adherence to the concept of academic freedom. Academic freedom does not mean that each student has the right to choose his or her own classes. It is the opportunity to hold opinions based on the best evidence one has, and to speak those opinions without fear of reprisal. It cannot, however, exist in an environment in which prejudice exists. Prejudice and academic freedom are mutually exclusive... one cannot have both.
A Chadron student recently wrote that the aforementioned gay student was not forced by anyone to abandon his education, that his departure was his own choice. I beg to differ. When prejudice interferes with the integrity of an institution of higher learning, it is the reponsibility of everyone, students and faculty alike, to take steps to eradicate it.
Sincerely,
Brian E. Petty Academic Advisor
Graduate Student
The Ohio State University Columbus, Ohio
________________________________________
Wed, 4 Dec 1996 20:49:42 -0500
In reference to the withdrawal of Matt McNeil from Chadron State, I would sincerely like for someone to explain to me how it can be believed ANYONE deserves to live with discrimination and harassment. Why, in God's name, should anyone have to live in fear because of gender, race, religion or sexual orientation as we approach the year 2000? Is it really necessary for every minority to have to struggle as the African Americans have to end prejudice and separation? Have we learned nothing??
Homosexuality is nothing to fear. It is not contagious and it is not a degenerate or immoral condition. Lesbian, Gays, Bisexual and transgendered people are our sons, daughters, mothers, fathers, cousins and friends. We love them for who they are, and perhaps if you'd get to know them, you might care for them too. Please make an effort to educate your community. Consider communicating with Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) to learn how you might enlighten the students at your institution.
Especially at this holiday season, why can't we remember that people are not defined by their sex, their color, their religion, etc., but rather remember that we are simply human beings and each of us were born with certain inalienable rights.
Deborah Lopitz
______________________________
Date: Fri, 6 Dec 1996 20:34:28 -0500
Whether or not Matt McNeil left Chadron because he was gay, the point is that he is gay and he did leave. The track record of gay students in school is that many of them leave because of harassment and worse, suicide is the leading cause of death of gay students. The challenge for America is make schools safe for ALL students.
D. Starshine, Ph.D.
_________________________________
Fri, 06 Dec 1996
To whom it may concern-
I am a straight, Christian Occidental College student who is concerned about Chadron College's attitude toward people of a different sexual orientation. This kind of discrimination is unacceptable in any situation or location. Matt McNeil felt that his only option left was to drop out of college, which must say something for the desperate situation he was forced into. There is NO EXCUSE for this kind of prejudice behavior. I read in the many letters sent addressing this issue that this discrimination is the result of a small community and that is why it occured. I am from a small, conservative town in Oregon and I can tell you that nothing like this would ever transpire there. Also, Occidental College is a very small "community" and they are extremely sensitive towards such issues. This can not be blamed upon anything but hate and prejudice. The people responsible for the pain Matt McNeil experienced should take responsibility for this injustice. I urge you to look into this further. Perhaps it is time for Chadron College to offer some sexuality awareness courses or seminars. Obviously, something must be done to remedy the current situation.
"Therefore let us stop passing judgement on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way." Romans 14:13
Deborah Salzillo
____________________________
Thu, 5 Dec 1996
I am writing with concern about the apparently poisoned climate for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered persons at Chadron State College.
We are each responsible for coming out in public as supporting people who are harmed by such a climate -- as Matt McNeil apparently has been -- AND for coming out in support of the principles of equal justice for all people in this democracy.
Please take your stand and do all that you can to change the climate at Chadron. If you are unsure what to do, please refer to the information contained in the Campaign Against Homophobia webpage http://www.critpath.org/action-project/chadron.html.
As this old slogan is sadly still relevant, I'll sign sincerely, 'We're here, we're queer, get used to it!'
Chris Vance
Graduate Student
Lesley College
Somerville, MA
___________________________
Sun, 8 Dec 1996
It is with great concern that I respond to the treatment of Matt McNeil at Chadrom State College. I can only say that I am relieved that my son received his education and graduated from a university with more concern and understanding of its students. It is a discrace that in this day of enlightenment that any institution of higher education would allow such ignorance and abuse to be tolerated on its campus without taken urgent and responsible action.
Donald B. Ross
___________________________
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